28

Dearest,

Tomorrow will be my 28th birthday. I know things will no longer be the same like the 9 birthdays I've had with you, because I can no longer be with you by my own choice. I know I won't get a cake and a bouquet of flowers this time. I won't get a surprise gift, these things you loved to do. Despite not having much, you always find ways to celebrate it with me, and it hurts me now because I have to get used to the new life I chose for myself.

I know that no matter how hard I try to explain why I chose this path, you will never understand or believe what I say. It's easy to blame that I have been unfaithful that's why things happened, but there's more than that. My infidelity is an excuse that you will never understand.

For my birthday, I wish these things:

1. May we both be happy with the new adventures we are about to go through apart.
2. That you will find the love of your life back (I always knew it wasn't me).
3. That may you live happily and peacefully.
4. That we will be great parents to our kids despite everything.

Yours,

Eponine

Rockstar

he just lost his biggest fan, and he's fighting hard to get her back, but she now loves another rockstar.
she miss the lights, the parties and endless nights, and now they're all there for her. 
and she's enjoying every thing they offer.
and he can't let her go, he won't let her go, but she's already gone.

A Letter 2 (9 years later)

Dearest,

Remember in college when I wrote a secret letter for you and we both can't believe that day would come that you would be able to read it? I remember the exact moment, place and reaction you had when you read that letter. I can still even remember your scent.

That day, was so special to me, and I thank the Lord we were given time together. 8 amazing years and a beautiful son, every mother would wish for. We've been through so much ups and downs and we've always managed to fix things, we thought nothing could break us. We couldn't live with and without each other.

Sadly, this letter is a goodbye. A goodbye to all that we've been through. For all the pain, for all the tears, for all the sadness, for all the disappointments that we have for each other.

But I will never say goodbye to laughter. I wish someday, you will be able to forgive me. I wish that someday, you will understand everything, why I'm doing this to us, to you.

I wish someday you could let me go. I wish someday you would stop blaming yourself and other people. I learned the hard way that it is best not to hold on to anything in this life. Just let it go, set things free. Let life flow through your veins. Give yourself up.

And as what Rachel said, "Nothing is wasted, you've breath the same air the same joy and pain as everyone else."

Sometimes people leave not because they've stopped loving the person, but simply because they were no longer happy.

I wish you all the happiness that I was never able to give you. I wish you will find what you are looking for in this life.


Always,

Katrina

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A Letter (9 years ago)

Dearest,

There was no magic when we first met, but as the time goes by, the feeling starts to grow inside me.

I don't know when it started but I don't care as long as I'm certain that I'm falling for you now!

Our laughs, our talks are making me feel close to you. Every time I see you around, my hearts starts beating fast, my legs shake and I don't feel at ease. At first I thought of it as an infatuation but the more you show me who you are, the more I fall. You gave me a flower last Friday the 13th and I was not expecting that. You may have not given me the best rose but the weird flower that you gave, means more than that. I have kept it not just in my safe, but also in my heart.

Remember the day when you played shooting my heart and told me to jump and you said you'd catch me? I was not taking it literally. What I had in mind was that the moment you shot me, it went straight to the most emotional and important organ of my body, my heart. And when you asked me to jump and promised to catch me, in my fantasies I imagined that you'd be there to catch my love falling right straight to you. I think of you as my sunshine, you take the darkness away. Days are better when I see every inch of you. The sound of your voice calms my confused mind. Just by talking to me, you paint a smile on my frowned face. It?s amazing how you do that. And just a touch from you gives shivers to my spine and relaxes my mind.

But dearest, I found out too late that you?re loving someone else and that is what's making me feel so sad. If only I found out about it so soon. You are not to blame for I know it was my fault for having those fantasies. For dreaming that I was yours and that you were mine. 

You're all I want, you're all I need, you're everything I ever wanted. Then it made me realize that I was too selfish for wanting and loving you that much. You deserve to be happy and not to worry about me. For my love is patient, my love is free and my misery means nothing to me. 

Loving you was not an accident because it's making me strong. I should go back to where I belong. In every sunshine there's always darkness. And now my world is facing the darkest night. I know someday, it'll face the day.

So I'll fight the good fight. And let it be, for you love her instead of me. There's no such thing as I'm giving you up for in the first place, I never had your heart. It was just friendship and this, I'll gladly take and treasure for it's the only thing I'll have of thee. 

Wish I could be every little thing you wanted. But all I can do now is pray, that both of you will be very happy. Hope she'll be happy as you shine on her, for a sun can never shine on both sides. But if ever the day comes your lights runs out, and
you need someone to love... I'll be glad to give you my heart and shine for free.

Loving you truly,
Katrina

ABCDE

"I will never leave you again", he said
"Nothing can stop us", he said
And I thought that I was saved from all torments, pain, and depression
And I thought we were in love and we were destined to be in union

I believed him when he said those words that gave me hope
But now he left me all alone to cope
I believed in words too much when they can easily be taken away
I loved him too much even if I knew he couldn't stay

Promises are not for ordinary men
People lie and leave promises broken
Almost gave everything up for the love of him
But a wild thing couldn't love anything

You mindless stupid fuck!

After 5 Years

What if we have kept our feelings to ourselves and spent the rest of our lives day dreaming the "What Ifs"?

But 5 years ago we were unable to stop ourselves from confessing our feelings to each other and it became a continuation from what had happened another 5 years before that.

Every 5 years, destiny pulls as back together. Drawn to each other, the universe wills it.

Dreams - Peter Pan

Happy

Happy that we had fixed the problem.
Happy that we had forgiven.
Happy that we had finally moved on.